Have you been told that you let our children get away with entirely too much? Is your parenting style constantly under attack by someone who disagrees with the way you do things? Are your children the ones who are left out of a lot of things because people don't seem to want deal with them? Believe it or not, it's likely your fault.
There is a chance that you're a pushover parent.
Signs and Symptoms of Pushover Parents No one likes to admit that they are the type o parent that they often find themselves talking about with other.
However, most people don't even realize that they are.
Being in denial is the worst thing because you can't change something that you don't realize.
So, ask yourself a few questions.
Are you the parent that your children always come to when they want something outlandish? If you are, it's most likely because even if you say no at first, you give them the chance to compromise; which means that you eventually give in any way.
Do your children always winding up getting what they want in the end.
Do you find that you're the one always making excuses for your child or children's behavior; even when they are clearly wrong? How often do you save them from the consequences of what they have done? When you take away your child's privileges, how long does it last? Or do you find yourself making exceptions for one reason or another.
If these things describe you, there is a chance that you're a pushover.
If your children are never held responsible for their actions, always get their way in the end and totally disregard your rules and regulations...
there is nothing else to call it.
You have to understand that continuing this kind of parenting can have some negative results.
The Pitfalls of Pushover Parenting One of the results of this style of parenting is that your child may not have as much respect for you or your authority as they probably should.
When your child knows that you will not stand your ground, they will not have any regard for anything that you set in place.
Why should they, when you constantly under-mind yourself? In order for your children to take you seriously, you have to say what you mean and mean what you say.
If not, there will be no parent/child respect.
Another issue that you will run into, without respect for authority being in place, is the blurring of the line.
Being a friend your child is something that every parent wants.
However, it's important to keep the lines clear.
You are a parent first and a friend second.
When that line becomes fuzzy, you set yourself up for all kinds of disrespect, disobedience and sheer disregard.
Never Too Late To Change Contrary to popular belief, it's never too late to change your parenting style; even if your children are all grown up.
Of course, it's better to start when they are younger.
Still, the most you'll risk is that your adult children will either think you have finally lost our mind or be upset with you for a little while.
Either way, you spent all of their lives loving them the best way you knew how.
If their behavior isn't indicative of any appreciation for all of the sacrifices that you made in doing so, change is mandatory.
The first thing you need to do is learn how to use the word "no".
It isn't a word that parents want to say all of the time but there are times when it's necessary.
It makes no sense to allow your child to do things that you know you don't approve of.
In the case of adult children, sometimes they have to learn from their own mistakes.
There comes a time when the cord has to be cut.
Second, you should always demand respect as a parent.
No matter what the situation is, you should not allow your child to speak to or treat you in any way that isn't appropriate.
The longer this is allowed to continue, the worse it will become.
You're the parent!!! Don't allow yourself to be abused by your child.
The last thing you need to learn is to stand your ground.
Children are crafty little creatures and will pull out all of the stops to get what they want.
Tears, tantrums and tirades should not be tolerated.
Nor should they result in a reward.
As you can see, there are fine lines in parenting; that when crossed can turn you into putty in your child's hands.
When you allow child to mold that putty, they gain control of a relationship that should be headed by the adults involved.
Don't be a pushover parent.
Put your foot down and take the reins.
You'll regret it if you don't.