Role of Parent, Teachers and Friends In my previous attention drawing assignment, I tried to share a few common problems, but today without diverting from key approach, I would dwell upon various other issues of tomorrow's teenagers.
In this computer savvy world, whereas new technologies have made insurmountable progresses in communication on one side; it has drastically widened the communication gap between parent, teachers and teenagers on the other.
Though it has reduced large geographical distances at the press of a button of mobile phones, but unfortunately it has created a very wide breach between growing thoughts of a teen and mature guidance of parents.
With these contemplations, I am going to identify people responsible for teenager's suicide, deliberate various types of stress and anxiety related pressures acting on teenager's mind and various obvious cumulative slip-ups of all.
Let me first discuss various people responsible for teenagers' suicide.
Invariably and obviously, the first person who is to be blamed would be parent; second teachers; third the friends in need and not of deed, and four some other wrong step for which teen got fascinated due to immature conduct and went astray.
The irresponsible conduct of parent's contributed towards 75 percent, teachers 30 percent, friends 4.
8 percent and other reasons were just below .
2 percent.
Why parent, despite losing their child share entire culpability blame? The irrefutable evidences heard from such parent's quote "Oh! I have killed my child? Had I paid attention -? In most of the cases, the parents had invariably abetted their teenager's suicide.
I do not mean that they willfully led their child to take extreme step but due to sheer ignorance and lack of time to devout has driven the child to take away his own life.
The important lapses identified after study reflects; o one lack of time to devout to child, o two lack of care at home, o three communication gap between parent and the child, o four over commitment of parent's on business or official matters, o five lack of will to listen to child, o six frequently admonishing child when he wants parent's attention and on ignorable errors, o seven unwilling to listen to your teen when he wants parent most, o eight careless handling and managing your teen's demands through servant or third person, o nine "Ask Papa/Mummy, I am too busy Syndrome", o tenth lack of will to interact with teen's teachers, tutors or coaches, o eleventh a few over committed parents tendency to outweigh love, affection and personal touch and feelings with bundles of money, o Twelfth and most important is overambitious parent.
Most of the unfortunate parent's whose teenagers had committed suicide had neglected their child, thereby, contributing towards suicide.
In addition to parents, how teachers play an unviable role in draconian problem of abetting suicide of my teenagers is a real question to investigate.
Three important factors were observed while interacting with teachers.
o First is the lack of personal touch and commitment amongst teachers in their noble cause towards society.
A large number of teachers, to continue their other professional activities, just do not dedicate enough time to students.
They place heavy demand of home work.
Many times, I have observed that various teachers have themselves failed to solve a problem but they dictated the same to students to solve at home.
Such crook teachers are more over a terror in schools.
o The second factor is accredited towards wide communication gap between teachers and students.
As most of teachers have Select Favorite Student Preferences (SFSP) syndrome, therefore, by and large such teachers neglect other students.
Such teachers are really a blob on adverse conditions of today's teens.
They encourage tendency of isolation and separation amongst weak students.
o Third and the foremost factor, I unearthed is careless, negligent and ineffectual teachers.
Though various organizations have honored hundred of teachers in the world but in most of the cases, such teachers managed to hoodwink the entire society.
As most of the teachers are employed on nepotism, they lack will to work.
In one of the student's suicide case, I found that had the teacher been approachable and not the terror, the teenager would have not taken extreme step of ending his life.
The readers would agree with me that the role of teachers in abetting suicide is further going to increase in future materialistic world.
The teachers would be continuously blamed for such lapses till they change their mind and differentiate between education as a Business or a social obligation.
The teacher's community is to be regularly sensitized towards their ever increasing challenge of teenager's suicide.
After parents and teachers, the next person who abets a teenager's suicide is untimely identified his "friends in need and not of deed".
Such friends who always eye for personal enjoyment are most dangerous.
The rich, neglected and disturbed teenagers frequently fall pray to such friends.
They began to share their problems with commoners, less studious and aimless friends.
An ignored adolescence gets easily carried away by such friends' gossip and ever supporting thoughts, thereby, lending in trouble.
Either such teenagers fall pray to drug peddlers or take up petty crimes to fulfill their unaffordable lavish life styles.
Most of the teens in the world, took to crime due to neglect at home and school.
It is parent's prime responsibility to ensure that their children do not fall pray to such friends.
Why I said "friends in need and not in deed" because most of the time such friends always looked at opportunity to exploit his ever neglected friend's his financial liberty.
Another cause which had cumulative effect is a teenager's hatred Behaviour towards parents, teachers and environment.
Such teenagers strongly feel neglected and thus they want to punish their parents.
Sometimes, a few teenagers themselves set certain own goals to achieve and make their family satisfied.
When they could not meet such goals, they took such drastic steps.
Despite of best care and love, I find my daughter Shruti had also tried to injure herself.
She took a fight with the God and tried to exhibit resentment towards supernatural power.
She refused to accept the existence of God and began to loose faith in herself.
She felt so because, she believed that my parents had an ambition which she had to fulfill.
When she found some problems, she took up fight with the God thereby exhibiting lack of self confidence.
During interaction, when we convinced her that our aim is not to credit what you became but our aim is to make you a good human being she understood and calmed down.
During interaction, she herself disclosed her mind, thereby, making us to handle her problem with an open mind.
I made her to believe that what we want is to make a good human being.
What you achieve is to our credit.
My only guidance is to work hard, put in efforts and do all activities under sound state of mind.
If you have performed well but could not make a grade, think that all other students have worked hard and put in extra efforts then you, that is why they faired better? Why to blame yourself for others hard work or excellence? She understood and began to prepare normally for studies and topped with 94 percent grade.
The important aspect is of faith of your child in the parents, teachers, friends and others including neighbors and relatives.
After having analyzed various factors I recommend following common remedial measures o Parents to interact daily with child minimum for an hour or so.
o All family member to make an effort to have minimum one meal breakfast, lunch or dinner together at dining table or common place.
o Minimum one outing of house with teenagers with family elders.
o Continuous interaction during examinations.
o Father to ensure regular talk with children.
o Teachers should carryout individual counseling of such students once a month o Teachers should pay special attention to weak students o Parents and teachers to keep an eye on children activities outside school hours.
o Parents should rely less on money love than personal care o Parents to make their children believe that they have full faith in them.
With this I conclude my analysis of responsibilities of various people who abet the suicide of their teenagers.
If we weigh and reevaluated our needs, desires and worldly comforts with that of our teen's lives, I am sure that the world would be able to celebrate year 2007 the "Suicide Free Teenagers Years - 2007 (SFTY-007).
I would further analyze the various stresses and other disturbances in teens mind when he find neglected at home and school.
What are the important visible signs and indicators that help parents and teachers to identify such teenagers and take extra care to save their precious lives? In my next part I would also touch upon as to why girls' teenagers are more prone to suicide than boys.
Part 3 to follow shortly and readers' invaluable comments are solicited.
An Appeal - Through Ezine Articles At the end and before I proceed, further let me convey my esteem Ezine readers' a very happy and prosperous year 2007 ahead.
I am also very optimistic that with these dedicated efforts, the teen's suicide would stop.
I request my teens that whenever you are under duress, please feel free to seek help rather than ending life.
You can call any teen helpline.
I am very hopefully dedicating the year 2007 as Suicide Free Teenagers Year -007 (SFTY-007) and hope the year would pass without a single teenager's suicide.