Banish Guilt For Not Doing or Being Enough, and Enjoy Peace of Mind
Guilt comes from doing or not doing things that you think you should or should not do.
It is not the Truth.
It does, however, point to certain rules that you have or that have been imposed upon you; and it reveals who you think you "should" be, in your case, a perfect, loving mom and a successful business woman.
When you violate the image of who you think you "should" be and what you believe you "should" do, you will feel guilty until you do one of these two things: 1.
) either change your actions to adhere to your rules, which often are made to protect your justified image.
(This one is impossible to maintain as you have discovered.
) 2.
) or change the justified image you have of yourself, probably of being a perfect mom and a savvy business owner - wonder woman.
Perfectionism is most likely costing you the peace that you seek here.
The easiest way you can discover your justified image, which is wreaking havoc in your life, is to complete this statement: As a mom, I must be seen as __________, or else I am a __________ mom.
As a savvy business woman, I must be seen as __________, or else I am a __________ businesswoman.
By trying to maintain your justified image, which we all have by the way, you will only perpetuate your feelings of guilt each time you act differently than your image.
The problem, in your case, is not a moral issue.
The problem is that your image becomes threatened.
There is no peace in this mental construct, ever.
Why? Because your image does not allow you to be human - to make mistakes and to fail.
It presents you as a "thing.
" It is a survival mechanism intended to have you be "good enough.
" Celebrate you by accepting who you truly are, a beautiful loving mom who makes mistakes and does the best that she can, and the savvy businesswoman who fails and succeeds, who is learning and growing daily.
Forgive yourself! This will bring you peace.
You deserve to live your life from a place of peace and acceptance, rather than perfection and expectation.
It takes courage to see yourself in the light of truth, and to accept what you see with compassion and forgiveness.
This is the spiritual path and Truth will always set you free from the patterns that no longer serve you.
It is not the Truth.
It does, however, point to certain rules that you have or that have been imposed upon you; and it reveals who you think you "should" be, in your case, a perfect, loving mom and a successful business woman.
When you violate the image of who you think you "should" be and what you believe you "should" do, you will feel guilty until you do one of these two things: 1.
) either change your actions to adhere to your rules, which often are made to protect your justified image.
(This one is impossible to maintain as you have discovered.
) 2.
) or change the justified image you have of yourself, probably of being a perfect mom and a savvy business owner - wonder woman.
Perfectionism is most likely costing you the peace that you seek here.
The easiest way you can discover your justified image, which is wreaking havoc in your life, is to complete this statement: As a mom, I must be seen as __________, or else I am a __________ mom.
As a savvy business woman, I must be seen as __________, or else I am a __________ businesswoman.
By trying to maintain your justified image, which we all have by the way, you will only perpetuate your feelings of guilt each time you act differently than your image.
The problem, in your case, is not a moral issue.
The problem is that your image becomes threatened.
There is no peace in this mental construct, ever.
Why? Because your image does not allow you to be human - to make mistakes and to fail.
It presents you as a "thing.
" It is a survival mechanism intended to have you be "good enough.
" Celebrate you by accepting who you truly are, a beautiful loving mom who makes mistakes and does the best that she can, and the savvy businesswoman who fails and succeeds, who is learning and growing daily.
Forgive yourself! This will bring you peace.
You deserve to live your life from a place of peace and acceptance, rather than perfection and expectation.
It takes courage to see yourself in the light of truth, and to accept what you see with compassion and forgiveness.
This is the spiritual path and Truth will always set you free from the patterns that no longer serve you.
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