I stood in front of an audience of nearly one hundred professionals at a conference.
It was my favorite content and presentation, but this time I had added a most interesting twist.
At this particular moment, all of them were on the stage and I was an audience of one applauding them.
How I managed to get an entire audience on a stage is certainly interesting.
Yet that was simply a fun and challenging experiment.
The more important principle I was illustrating and teaching has to do with our attitude toward an audience.
Unfortunately, something problematic occurs over time as we speak before audiences.
With applause and acclaim what we might call the "ego of the speaker" distorts our focus.
The same problem occurs for leaders.
The more times we stand before an audience, the more likely it is that we begin to believe we are the most important point of focus.
Imagine this scene.
You are the keynote speaker or the senior leader at a conference.
Your lengthy and impressive biography has just been read, and the emcee delivered a powerful motivational call to the audience.
They have risen to their feet and are applauding and cheering you.
At that moment, without caution, the human ego responds to attention and approval by turning its focus inward rather than outward.
For countless speakers and leaders this is the moment we become lost in ourselves.
Our audience has become merely a tool for our gratification.
Our message no longer serves them; it is used to draw attention to ourselves.
I know these are challenging thoughts.
Believe me I know.
It is some of the most valuable feedback I ever received.
One courageous person was willing to tell me that I had become so wrapped up in myself and my message, I had left the audience behind.
Here I must quote.
"It's not about you, Ron.
" Those words were a blow to my ego, and yet it was a great gift to me.
If you study highly successful speakers and leaders, you will find first and foremost that they provide value to their audiences.
They don't speak about their favorite subjects or draw attention to themselves, they serve the audience with valuable material.
More importantly they serve the audience by being real, which they accomplish by not losing themselves within themselves.
Seeing True Those who listen to us want to be given to, not done to.
Seeing True in Action Here are questions I've learned to use to guide me through this otherwise cumbersome challenge:

• What does this audience need above all else? (Don't focus on what you want to say, but on what they need from you.
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• How can I best deliver that content in a way that gives them the greatest opportunity to receive what they need and want?
• Through what means can I be as real to them as possible, so something can be catalyzed for and through them? (A good rule of thumb is whether you make your own palms sweat by risking openness and authenticity.
  )

Just before going on stage in front of the audience, take a few deep breaths.
Then ask yourself honestly, "Am I here for them, or am I here for me?" (By the way, this doesn't mean you can't have fun and be yourself.
It simply means to avoid the black hole of self by admitting its allure, then deliberately turning your attention to the audience.
) Based on that final answer, make any last minute changes to diminish yourself into the role of servant speaker or leader.
Never forget, they are why you are here.
It's not about you.